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Most Read This Week

Electricity fails to go off during heavy rains

In a bizarre development, electricity in and around the city was found on without any…

3 Min Read

Tensions run high as wife utters name of ex during love making

Najeera. In a major relationship gaffe, Sharon Namubiru, 29, blurted out the name of her…

5 Min Read

Little Johnny discovers “Holy Shit”, writes to Kiwani Post

Dear Kiwani Post, I am writing to you to let you know that I’ve discovered…

3 Min Read

Pregnancy – Muganda vs Mukiga Woman

Alot has been said about baganda and bakiga women. Baganda have been termed as being…

3 Min Read

Latest News

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Your guide to giving a bullshit business presentation

CALLED upon to give a presentation at work? Here’s how to hit the right note of business bullshit to drive the company drones wild.  Kick…

Our Reporter
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Research: This Article Successfully Pads Out Content Quota

KAMPALA — According to a new report released Friday, this article, the…

2 Min Read

Accept my apology for shagging your best friend and emptying the joint account, man tells wife

Brian Isabirye informed wife Diana he deserves credit for coming clean after…

2 Min Read

Cows demand to be next Ugandan President

Mbarara; As the next Presidential elections in Uganda 2016 come closer, various…

4 Min Read

Man Contracts Syphilis After Licking Dance Pole – Sues Kimansulo Club

Kampala | A 28-year-old man who has contracted syphilis after licking a…

2 Min Read
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Ugandan TV viewers bored of old scams, demand new and interesting ones

With the news in media recently restricted to a few scams by politicians, Ugandans have demanded that there better be some new and interesting scams. If the media doesn't report any…

3 Min Read

Kampala potholes welcome KCCA confusion

Potholes living in Kampala and Uganda at large have welcomed the confusion happening at Kampala…

Rolex successfully fried on benches of Ministry of Public Service

Two huge rolexes (chapati and eggs) have successfully been fried on the benches warmed by…

Rules of my future woman

So you think you got rules? .. check out what this man has in his…

Just for You

Passengers encouraged to pray before boarding

In wake of another report highlighting the increase of road accidents in Uganda, Government has decided…

3 Min Read

Parents Worried They’ll Have To Raise Their Own Children As Schools Shut Down

UGANDA — Parents across the nation have expressed their worry, fear, and shock at having…

1 Min Read

Terrorists organise Exhibition in the Rwenzori after NBS TV error

Kabarole -- Thousands of terrorists from different parts of world are expected to tour the…

3 Min Read

The womaniser’s guide to post-coital etiquette

ARE you a man confused by how much time you should waste after sex cuddling?…

3 Min Read

Cows demand to be next Ugandan President

Mbarara; As the next Presidential elections in Uganda 2016 come closer, various Cow groups in Uganda have demanded that a…

The photos can move left and right .. swii swee .. see?

These Uganda Policemen where spotted sometime back looking at a tablet and with the expression on their faces, I am…

Bed bugs traumatized as NRM MPs fight for bed in Kyankwanzi

A group of four of us were sucking blood from some juicy female MP on bed number 36 and we…

KCCA to set up Pick-pocket Recuperation Centers

In a major move aimed at securing a moral victory over pick-pockets in downtown Kampala, the Kampala City Council Authority…

Embarrassed Woman Sneaks Out Of House Early Morning After Sex With Husband

“I had a few too many drinks last night and made a huge mistake. Now…

1 Min Read

Telephone Conversation – Men Vs Women

Telephone conversations can mask alot when on call but it is all let out once…

2 Min Read

Bats deny destroying Apac health facilities

The Bat community in Northern Uganda, which has been accused of invading several health facilities in Apac…

3 Min Read

As Lockdown ends, Churches Having To Remind People To Put On Pants

Kampala — Some churches across the nation have begun reopening, but church officials are running…

2 Min Read

Ugandan Men React to national budget

The National Budget has not gone down well with most Ugandans and Ugandan men have come up with the following changes…

1 Min Read

Trip Organizer Forced To Remove Sober Client From Road Trip Bus

KAMPALA — After management of a road trip around dubbed Uganda 360 escorted a passenger…

You know your mother is Ugandan …

1. You Know Your Mother Is Ugandan if she has a drawer or a place…

Researcher asks citizens to go easy on beans after concerns over coronavirus spreading through farts

In yet another announcement related to coronavirus, a local reseracher today asked citizens to avoid…

Resident fails to return home after being unable to recognize the empty roads during lockdown

Kampala. A city resident who had gone out to buy milk from across the street was…

Road fails to develop potholes – Contractor blacklisted

Kampala. Local construction companies and consultants cutting across ideological and political divide have joined forces to denounce and suggest the…

2 Min Read

Top Writers

Our Reporter 100 Articles
Kiwani Post publishes news with no reliable sources. Do not read if you are too religious, too political, too sentimental,...
Brian Tumusiime 16 Articles

Must Read

Rules of my future woman

So you think you got rules? .. check out what this man has in his "rule book" for his wife.…

KCCA to set up Pick-pocket Recuperation Centers

In a major move aimed at securing a moral victory over pick-pockets in downtown Kampala, the Kampala City Council Authority…

Rolex successfully fried on benches of Ministry of Public Service

Two huge rolexes (chapati and eggs) have successfully been fried on the benches warmed by people who frequent the Pensions…

NRM and FDC shirts clash inside basin, situation tense

Two t-shirts, a yellow one from the NRM and a blue one from the FDC have clashed in a basin…

EC Voter Register Update – Ghost Voters Demand Inclusion: ‘We Have Rights Too!’

In a surprising twist to Uganda’s electoral preparations, a group of self-proclaimed “ghost voters” has come forward to express their frustration at being excluded from the ongoing update of the…

6 Min Read

EC Voter Register Update – Ghost Voters Demand Inclusion: ‘We Have Rights Too!’

In a surprising twist to Uganda’s electoral preparations, a group of self-proclaimed “ghost voters” has…

Relax, I’m Just Here for the Vibes!’ – Ebola virus downplays USA travel advisory

In a groundbreaking and slightly unsettling turn of events, Ebola has granted an exclusive interview…

Corruption distances self from protest march to parliament

In an unprecedented move today, Corruption officially distanced itself from a large-scale protest march headed…

The womaniser’s guide to post-coital etiquette

ARE you a man confused by how much time you should waste after sex cuddling?…

Man arrested for failure to handover TV remote to wife after Fifa Worldcup

A Ugandan man who had confiscated the TV remote from his wife during the FIFA world Cup 2014 in Brazil…

Rats in Parliament lose hearing sensation

Kampala. Mulago doctors have found that rats (rodents, not human beings) living in the Ugandan Parliament have been suffering from…

Family Looks Forward To New Church Solving All Their Problems

KAMPALA — The Mukasa family has had lots of problems at the local church they've attended for the past five…

Electricity fails to go off during heavy rains

In a bizarre development, electricity in and around the city was found on without any load shedding even during heavy…

The new Job titles of today’s generation

Finding a decent job in Uganda is quite a hassle and after getting one, some of us need a decent…

Adulterated fuel prices to remain stable – AFC

Kampala - Ugandan Motorists can look forward to not paying a shilling more for adulterated petrol this month, announced the Uganda Adulterated Fuel Council (AFC). "We assure all our unsuspecting…

2 Min Read

Politics

17 Articles

EC Voter Register Update – Ghost Voters Demand Inclusion: ‘We Have Rights Too!’

In a surprising twist to Uganda’s electoral preparations, a group of self-proclaimed “ghost voters” has come forward to express their frustration at being excluded from the ongoing update of the…

6 Min Read

Relax, I’m Just Here for the Vibes!’ – Ebola virus downplays USA travel advisory

In a groundbreaking and slightly unsettling turn of events, Ebola has granted an exclusive interview to Kiwani Post to address the recent travel advisories issued by the USA and the…

6 Min Read

Corruption distances self from protest march to parliament

In an unprecedented move today, Corruption officially distanced itself from a large-scale protest march headed towards Parliament. Speaking at an exclusive press conference, Mr. Corruption declared that he had "nothing…

3 Min Read

The womaniser’s guide to post-coital etiquette

ARE you a man confused by how much time you should waste after sex cuddling? Chauvinist and self-appointed ‘God’s gift to women’ Wayne Hayes explains.

3 Min Read

Horrified man discovers going to bed early makes him less tired following day

I’d never have guessed I could eradicate my tiredness by not being tired. It still doesn’t make much sense to me but I’d recommend it to anyone.

2 Min Read

Breaking: All Of Uganda’s Problems Solved Overnight While You Were Sleeping

KAMPALA—In a string of overwhelming and unexpected successes, all of the uganda’s problems, from corruption to disease to high costs of living, were reportedly solved while you slept, with each…

2 Min Read

Makerere University Students Put Under Quarantine After Exposure To Library Book

Makerere University — Warning that the dangerous contaminant could have easily killed someone if the proper precautions had not been taken, students at Uganda's oldest university were reportedly locked in…

2 Min Read

Kampala Meat Packers Hires Assassins To Quietly Slaughter Cows In Their Sleep

Industrial Area - Addressing the need to incorporate more humane practices at its facilities, management at Meat Parkers announced Thursday that it had hired assassins to quietly slaughter cows in…

2 Min Read

Landlord Informs Tenants He’s Increasing Endless Economic Anxiety By 200K

KAMPALA — Blaming the change on factors like inflation and steep URA taxes that were out of his control, local landlord Byakagaba Andrew reportedly informed his tenants Monday that he…

2 Min Read

Trip Organizer Forced To Remove Sober Client From Road Trip Bus

KAMPALA — After management of a road trip around dubbed Uganda 360 escorted a passenger off the trip bus and charged him with orderly conduct, FlySafaris, a travel agent has…

2 Min Read
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