Clueless Police to bribe murderers in exchange for clues about next victim
Kampala. Unable to gather any clues about the recent mind boggling murders in the country from its intelligence agencies, the Uganda Police has decided to use its most trusted tool to tackle…
Headlines
Your Trusted Source for Accurate and Timely Updates!
Most Read This Week
Churches Scramble To Widen Doorways As Sheep Return From Lockdown 50kgs Heavier
Kampala — Several churches in Uganda are being forced to widen their doors so returning…
Five nightmare wankers you’ll end up sat next to on a Uganda Airlines plane
GOING on holiday aboard Uganda Airlines? Prepare yourself to endure five hours stuck next to…
Embarrassed Woman Sneaks Out Of House Early Morning After Sex With Husband
“I had a few too many drinks last night and made a huge mistake. Now…
Kampala potholes welcome KCCA confusion
Potholes living in Kampala and Uganda at large have welcomed the confusion happening at Kampala…
Latest News
Research: This Article Successfully Pads Out Content Quota
KAMPALA — According to a new report released Friday, this article, the one you are currently reading, has successfully padded out Kiwani Post’s daily content…
Cows demand to be next Ugandan President
Mbarara; As the next Presidential elections in Uganda 2016 come closer, various…
Telecom Customer Faints on Finding Internet Data Still Intact After 3 Minutes
A telecom company has created a record of a kind by not…
Woman Hopes Husband Listened Closely To Pastor’s Sermon On Self-Righteousness
Ntinda, Kampala — Local woman Namakula Rachel told KiwaniPost on Sunday she…
Adulterated fuel prices to remain stable – AFC
Kampala - Ugandan Motorists can look forward to not paying a shilling…
Rules of my future woman
So you think you got rules? .. check out what this man has in his "rule book" for his wife. 1. My woman isn’t allowed to laugh at other peoples…
Just for You
Horrified woman forgets to tell social media she’s had her Covid jab
A WOMAN who has just joined thousands of Ugandans in having her Covid vaccine is…
Your guide to giving a bullshit business presentation
CALLED upon to give a presentation at work? Here’s how to hit the right note…
7 bad habbits of men trying to impress a Girl
This guide is written for guys, who want a girl, but end up making a…
The womaniser’s guide to post-coital etiquette
ARE you a man confused by how much time you should waste after sex cuddling?…
Horrified woman forgets to tell social media she’s had her Covid jab
A WOMAN who has just joined thousands of Ugandans in having her Covid vaccine is mortified she forgot to share…
Kampala’s Potholes in a state of panic as KCCA Threatens to Fix Them
Kampala potholes have received information that KCCA is planning to fix them soon. This has caused a state of panic…
Criminals Dispute Uganda Police Crime Report
KAMPALA — Uganda Police Force’s recently released monthly crime report has incensed ccriminals across Uganda who have come forward to…
Electricity fails to go off during heavy rains
In a bizarre development, electricity in and around the city was found on without any load shedding even during heavy…
Horrified woman forgets to tell social media she’s had her Covid jab
A WOMAN who has just joined thousands of Ugandans in having her Covid vaccine is…
As Lockdown ends, Churches Having To Remind People To Put On Pants
Kampala — Some churches across the nation have begun reopening, but church officials are running…
Horrified man discovers going to bed early makes him less tired following day
I’d never have guessed I could eradicate my tiredness by not being tired. It still…
Bats deny destroying Apac health facilities
The Bat community in Northern Uganda, which has been accused of invading several health facilities in Apac…
Jubilation as potholes celebrate Musisi’s contract renewal
There was jubilation among the pothole community on Tuesday when news landed in the ears of the prestigious Kampala pothole…
HR admins to approach Election losers for degree verification and background checks on new employees
HR managers in Uganda have decided to seek services of election losers for education certificate verifications because they are very…
Top Writers
Must Read
Chicken strike over use of eggs by Easter Bunnies
The Uganda Layers Association (ULA) has threatened to stage a demonstration against the Easter bunnies over the use of eggs…
Electricity fails to go off during heavy rains
In a bizarre development, electricity in and around the city was found on without any load shedding even during heavy…
Animals no longer interested in taking part in Protests
Kampala. After being forced by human beings to take part in protests around the city for various reasons, animals including…
We’re not intimidated – Corrupt Ugandans tell off President
Kampala - Corrupt Politicians in Uganda vowed yesterday they will not be intimidated by the President and his old new…
Most Read
Uganda Police creates Squad to save new year resolutions from being broken
Every year, millions and millions of innocent resolutions die in their infancy. Many unfortunate poor ones don’t even get to…
Horrified woman forgets to tell social media she’s had her Covid jab
A WOMAN who has just joined thousands of Ugandans in having her Covid vaccine is mortified she forgot to share…
EC Voter Register Update – Ghost Voters Demand Inclusion: ‘We Have Rights Too!’
In a surprising twist to Uganda’s electoral preparations, a group of self-proclaimed “ghost voters” has come forward to express their…
Clueless Police to bribe murderers in exchange for clues about next victim
Kampala. Unable to gather any clues about the recent mind boggling murders in the country from its intelligence agencies, the Uganda Police…
Bats deny destroying Apac health facilities
The Bat community in Northern Uganda, which has been accused of invading several health facilities in Apac District destroying some of the…
Accept my apology for shagging your best friend and emptying the joint account, man tells wife
Brian Isabirye informed wife Diana he deserves credit for coming clean after the Whatsapp messages, bank statements, CCTV footage and phone nudes were discovered
Woman Still Expects Ex To Fix Her Wifi, Listen To Work Drama
Ivan and I agreed that nothing should change just because we broke up,” Tracy said, eating her Rolex with nyanya mbisi. So obviously, he’ll still come over to fix my…
Money Lenders Mourn Lost Opportunity to Fund Next Pope’s Election
The disappointment stems from the Vatican’s strict rules on papal elections, which inexplicably forbid bribery, extortion, or last-minute "financial motivation" for votes. This has left Ugandan lenders confused and offended.
Fake Academic Paper Holders Urge Calm Amidst Mass Verification
Kampala, Uganda* – In what can only be described as the least surprising scandal of the decade, Kampala District has been thrown into chaos after an ongoing probe exposed a…
I’ve Been Through Hell! – Mathias Walukagga’s Left Hand Speaks Out
Kiwani Post managed to secure an exclusive interview with the hand, which spoke to us through a series of interpretive gestures and Morse code taps on a nearby table.
Criminals Dispute Uganda Police Crime Report
KAMPALA — Uganda Police Force’s recently released monthly crime report has incensed ccriminals across Uganda who have come forward to dispute the findings, claiming they have been “on their best…
EC Voter Register Update – Ghost Voters Demand Inclusion: ‘We Have Rights Too!’
In a surprising twist to Uganda’s electoral preparations, a group of self-proclaimed “ghost voters” has come forward to express their frustration at being excluded from the ongoing update of the…
Relax, I’m Just Here for the Vibes!’ – Ebola virus downplays USA travel advisory
In a groundbreaking and slightly unsettling turn of events, Ebola has granted an exclusive interview to Kiwani Post to address the recent travel advisories issued by the USA and the…
Corruption distances self from protest march to parliament
In an unprecedented move today, Corruption officially distanced itself from a large-scale protest march headed towards Parliament. Speaking at an exclusive press conference, Mr. Corruption declared that he had "nothing…
The womaniser’s guide to post-coital etiquette
ARE you a man confused by how much time you should waste after sex cuddling? Chauvinist and self-appointed ‘God’s gift to women’ Wayne Hayes explains.
Horrified man discovers going to bed early makes him less tired following day
I’d never have guessed I could eradicate my tiredness by not being tired. It still doesn’t make much sense to me but I’d recommend it to anyone.
Mini Games
Wordle
Guess words from 4 to 11 letters and create your own puzzles.
Letter Boxed
Create words using letters around the square.
Magic Tiles
Match elements and keep your chain going.
Chess Reply
Play Historic chess games.